Jottings from the Granite Studio

It’s been a busy week here in Beijing. The Olympic year is not yet two weeks old and China is already doing its damnedest to serve up a whole stir-fry of crazy.

First off, 2008 has thus far not been kind to CCTV. While the state-run station has never really considered itself either yellow or violent, this reliable source of unintentional comedy for those of us living in Beijing has done its best to force that phrase into the cultural lexicon. (Plastered T-Shirts needs to get on this right away, how could they not?) EastSouthWestNorth has also provided a handy list of the top ten ‘very yellow, very violent’ websites for your surfing convenience.

Not to be outdone by the news division, CCTV sports, or, as it is now known, The Olympic Channel, staggered out of the gate when the amorous wanderings of sportscaster Zhang Bin drew the ire of his wife at the official kick-off ceremony. Hell hath no fury like a women scorned with access to cameras, microphones, and a soundstage. The money quote in my book:

“Until China is able to start exporting its values, it won’t be able to become a great power. For us to appear so prim and proper, yet Zhang Bin can’t even be brought to face his own - he won’t even face his hurt wife. I think China, as a - to succeed as a great power - don’t any of you have a conscience at all?”

The most fascinating part of the video is clearly the producers, security, and stagehands for the ceremony–all of whom were watching their careers flash before their eyes as this women pulled a nutty on camera. For those curious at what Chinese “PR crisis management” looks like, or if you’re jonesing for a fix of schadenfreude, by all means check out this clip on YouTube.

Speaking of PR and crisis management, everyone must read The Imagethief’s take on the attempt by a couple of provincial officials to muzzle a Beijing journalist. Great quote from Will:

“Out of this we are treated once again to elegant proof of a timeless public relations truth: The best way to compound a crisis is to be busted trying to cover it up. This applies even in China and even to the government. The Xifeng county authorities have managed to blow a local scandal into nationwide outrage at near record-speed. They did it without even having to poison an entire river in the process, as Jilin provincial officials had done when they were caught trying to suppress news of the Songhua River benzene disaster of 05. Another superb example was when the superbly-named China Railway 12th Bureau Group Company got caught trying to hush up the death of workers excavating for new Beijing subway lines last April.

But so far as I know, no one has tried the simple scandal-propelling expedient of enraging the entire Chinese national press corps. This is truly innovative, and the Xifeng county authorities deserve due recognition for their efforts.”

Real Keystone cops stuff out of Liaoning.

Of course, local officials also have more persuasive and efficient ways to keep things quiet, as citizen journalist Wei Wenhua tragically discovered while attempting to film some hired legbreakers busting up a demonstration by local residents. Members of the ‘cheng’guan’, a truly shady institution if there ever was one, then turned on Wei, beating him to death. Fortunately, even the Chinese government knows this is too much and they’ve ordered an extensive investigation into Wei’s murder. The incident has also focused attention on the cheng’guan, who are basically groups of paid thugs hired by the police or ‘local business interests’ when they need extra muscle. Beijing residents might remember them as the yahoos who last autumn turned a Sanlitun’r drug raid into Friday night at a Klan rally. John Kennedy at Global Voices Online has a great post this week looking into the cheng’guan phenomenon. Definitely a must-read.

More news from the wacky world of Beijing PR, Chinese environmental protection agencies got caught with their pants at ankle-height this past week. Turns out that the measurements of ‘blue sky days’ in Beijing for 2007 were assisted by a new process that measures pollution levels at stations in the mountainous rural areas of northern Beijing rather than downtown where there are, you know, cars and stuff. Wall Street Journal has the report.

Out of Taiwan comes news that the DPP has decided to stand down the guards at the tombs of former leaders Chiang Kai-shek and son. Chiang’s legacy is obviously a complicated one, but expect some new insights and fascinating reading coming to a bookstore near you. Historians now have access to the Generalissimo’s voluminous diaries covering the years 1915-1972, and no doubt there are new books and dissertations being planned at this very moment. Historian Yang Tianshi is quoted as saying: “Chiang’s diaries are of such historical value that they could rewrite modern Chinese history.” More thoughts from fellow historians here and here.

As for removing the honor guard from the mausoleums, the Taipei Times went for the daily double, and couldn’t resist giving a little poke in the eye to both the KMT and the Beijing government:

“The military police guarding the statue of Sun Yat-sen at Sun Yat-sen Memorial Hall will also have to be removed: The time of people guarding statues of historical figures has passed.

The way the remains of dictators are treated is, after all, an indicator of a country’s democratic maturity.”

Yeah, that’s probably true. For example, you don’t see too many modern, developed nations who believe in pickling the corpses of former leaders and then putting them on display under glass. I’m just saying…

From Japan Probe, other Taiwan news: The Japanese company Gakken Toys has issued a recall of its “Talking Globes,” when it was discovered that the globes’ talking feature declared Taiwan to be a territory of the People’s Republic of China. Apparently the manufacturer, based in Shenzhen, refused to make the globes unless the company agreed to label Taiwan as part of the PRC.

Not that it’s ever easy to source products in China, even those products without geopolitical baggage. Will Foreman of the AP has a well-written and balanced article on product quality and business ethics among Chinese manufacturers. Anecdotes about pathologically dishonest and venal managers and salespeople in China are part and parcel of business lore here, but Foreman argues that it goes both ways. Foreign demands on Chinese manufacturers often undermine attempts to improve product quality and help to encourage an already flourishing culture of cut-throat capitalism and sketchy business practices.

Finally, proof that the loopiness of 2008 is international, from California, fellow China historian and avid horticulturalist Wu Ming writes a brilliant post: “A letter to the unknown person who stole my fruit.” I feel sorry for Wu Ming’s orange crop, but it just goes to show that craziness knows no national boundaries.

Have a great weekend and Go Pats!